Its starts with a glance. That glance becomes a stare which becomes a moment of truth. One of the greatest challenges I’ve had to face all my life is finding the courage to look at myself in the mirror and be happy with myself. The longer I stare the more I began to critique, picking myself apart piece by piece and flaw by flaw until I feel empty and worthless. There are days when these feelings come and go but once it arrives it takes hours, sometimes days to leave. Those who are the prettiest are the happiest; or at least I thought this was the truth. For most of my life I’ve been searching for beauty, searching for perfection because I thought it would fill the empty places in my life. I thought I would find happiness. I was never the prettiest. I was never smartest. I was never voted most popular or likely to succeed but I’ve realized none of that defines me. Looking in the mirror today is still a struggle but every day is another step toward understanding who I am, my worth to myself and my value to others. Until you understand that God created you perfectly flawed, you’ll be searching for happiness forever. Beauty is found in our flaws because it makes us unique. Bear with me as I share who I AM behind the talent, smile, fashion and make-up. Allow me to share with you the Bare Me.
My body, my skin, my hair, and my mind were given to me and at times I question God. Is this what love looks like? When you love someone you give them your best. You spend time creating their gifts. You’d go above and beyond because you want them to be happy. If that’s true, then why do I feel at a disadvantage?
Why does it feel like everyone is moving past me? Why haven’t I received the same opportunities in my career? Why can’t I have her look? Why aren’t I further a long?
As women, we all face many challenges in life that make us question our very existence. For me, I have fought my weight all my life. The higher the number on the scale the more worthless I felt. It seemed everyone overlooked and counted out because of how I looked. To be honest, these feelings have spilled over into how I feel in my marriage. My husband makes it a point to remind me daily how beautiful I am and no matter how many times he’s told me; I couldn’t accept it. Your mirror can be your biggest truth and your greatest lie. The truth is, your mirror is a reflection of who God created you to be, how you see yourself as and who you believe you are. The lie is, you’re not anyone’s definition of beautiful and no one has the power to tell you what you can accomplish or who you can be. Beauty is found in understanding who you are inside and out.
I was at a painting class for my sisters-in-law’s birthday and we all were assigned the same painting. Some came out exactly how it was supposed to, mine… I’ll just leave it at that. I noticed that although we were given the same painting we all painted our own way. The colors outside of the line, the different motion of paint strokes and the colors we used made our painting’s unique. I view myself in this same way. Discovering beauty in myself was really accepting who I am. What people label flaws are really God’s fingerprint making you unique. You and I are perfectly flawed.
Song of Solomon 4:7 – You are altogether beautiful, my love; there is no flaw in you.
I recently challenged myself to stand in front of a camera with no makeup and no fancy flawless hair style. I wanted to present myself just as I am. It sounds crazy but I was blown away. What I got in return was a picture of healing. My eyes began to fill with tears, because the camera showed me what I didn’t think was possible. My flaws are beautiful and without them I wouldn’t be me and you wouldn’t be you. If you find yourself like me, struggling to find beauty I want to remind you of the truth. You are beautiful beyond words and no one can take that from you. You have power in your voice, love in your heart, and wisdom in your mind. Tell yourself how amazing and stunning you are before you give the opportunity to someone else. You owe it to yourself to believe in who God created you to be before the world tells you who you are.
Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind. – Bernard Baruch
Don’t allow anyone to place value on you. You and only you have that power. Stand strong, stand bold and most importantly don’t be afraid of the bare you. You are uniquely flawed because God created you to be one of a kind.